It’s well documented about how Kamala Harris makes no sense when she speaks in public. So, here are my examples of speaking Kamala-speak.
Boat
I was on a boat. And, it was floating on the water. Boats float. And, they don’t even sink. And, I was on the boat. I was looking at the water. And I wondered why the boat doesn’t sink. Then, I remembered that it floats. Right on top of the water.
Night
It was night. And, it was so dark. I couldn’t see anything. You can see things when it’s not night. Some people sleep at night. But, some people sleep when it’s not night. Joe sleeps when it’s night and when it’s day. It’s not dark during the day. So, you might bump into things at night.
DVD
You put a little disc in the machine and a movie starts playing. The little disc spins around because I can hear it. The disc looks like a doughnut. But, you can’t eat it. Because it is a movie. And, you can play a movie by putting the disc in a little machine. But sometimes the movie doesn’t play. Because the disc is a doughnut.
Giraffe
The giraffe has long legs and a long neck. I don’t know any other animals like that. A person can have long legs and a long neck. But, the person wouldn’t be a giraffe. A lion is not a giraffe. Because a lion doesn’t have long legs and a long neck. But, a giraffe does. Maybe a person can be a giraffe.
Cold
I don’t like when it’s cold. Because it’s not hot. I wear a jacket when it’s cold. But, I don’t wear a jacket when it’s hot. Some places on the Earth are always cold. Those places are not hot. Deserts are hot. Because they’re not cold.
Soap
There is a little bar in my shower. When I put in under the water, it foams. And, when I rub it on my body, the dirt runs off. When I rub it on the tile, it doesn’t do anything. Sometimes I rub it on my eyes, but it hurts really bad. It’s really fun to rub it on that piece of cloth in the shower. Then, when I rub the piece of cloth on the tile, the dirt runs off the tile.
Pencil
Did you see that? When that person moved that stick across that paper, it made marks! But, when the person put it down, it stopped making marks. That stick is like magic. But, it only works when a person moves it. It won’t work if a person isn’t touching it. Can I move the stick?
Blender
When I put something in the blender, it just sits there. But, when I push a button, it turns to liquid. The machine turns around and around and chops up something. If I push the button when nothing is in there, nothing happens. Sometimes I forget to put the lid on, and when I push the button, stuff goes everywhere. I don’t think it would be a good idea to put my hand in there. Because it will go everywhere.
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