Top Ten Funny Movies
Hollywood doesn’t make funny movies anymore. They are so scared of making some woke mistake that they avoid funny movies altogether now. So instead, we get woke movies and comic book movies. So, I’ll give you my top ten funny movies with hope that a Hollywood studio will make one of them.
Flip Flop
In retirement, Dr. Fauci can’t decide if he wants pancakes or not. At first, he tells his wife that he wants pancakes. So, she starts making them. Then, he tells her he doesn’t want pancakes. So, she stops. Then, he says he wants pancakes. So, she flips a pancake toward him and it flops on his head.
Turtle
A turtle decides to run for the Senate and aspires to be the leader of his party. After winning, he learns he has a super power that no one else does. He can retreat his head into his shell when anything controversial happens. And, people can’t say “get your head out of your a$*” because that’s not where his head is. Or, is it?
Hunter’s Playhouse
Hunter “yucks it up” with special guests in his cartoon playhouse. Bigfoot comically pretends to be the real “big guy.” Scooby Doo and Shaggy teach Hunter how to catch “Scooby snacks” in his mouth without using his arms. “Cracky Piper” and Hunter demonstrate how to get crack pipes from a machine without paying. And, Hunter and “Sneaky Pete” jokingly share United States secrets with China for money.
Getting Trump
Much like the movie “Catch Me If You Can,” this movie takes a funny look at the Democrats’ attempt to stop Trump from running for president in the next election. First, they leave a trail of breadcrumbs to a prison rather than election headquarters. But, they aren’t McDonald’s bread crumbs, so Trump pays no attention. Second, they blindfold Trump, turn him around three times, and point him to a prison. Finally, they offer to play hide and seek. But, Trump counts to 100 and leaves without looking for them.
Bud “Light”
In order to try to gain their customers back, Anheuser Busch decides to implement equity and inclusion. So, they decide to put a photo of a naked old man on some cans, and a photo of a naked old woman on some cans. When this doesn’t work, they create a “tuck friendly” can so anybody who still drinks Bud Light can tuck their “you know” while they drink it. So appropriate!
Electric Car
A man wants to save the environment, so he trades in his gas powered car for an electric car. Unfortunately, he has to take a second mortgage on his house to pay for the electric car. He immediately goes to his local hardware store to buy a fifty foot extension cord. The next day, he decides to drive his new car to work. So, he plugs in the extension cord and drives 45 feet. Then, his wife unplugs the cord and he pulls it to him and plugs it in at Wal-Mart. He drives another 45 feet and does the same thing again. He is immediately fired when he arrives seven hours late to work.
“No Chance” Club
A bunch of nobodies join the 2024 Republican presidential race. Even though they are losing by sixty points in the polls, they believe they can win. When one of them moves up from 0.5% to 0.75%, she declares that she is on her way. To keep the momentum, she declares that her preferred pronouns are “she” and “her.” Of course, social media attacks her for having boring pronouns. In response, she changes her preferred pronouns to “no” and “chance.” She gets a bump of .01% in the polls and declares that the front runner better look out.
Kitten
A kitten decides to chase it’s tail. It spins around and around trying to get it. Occasionally, the kitten comes close to getting it. But, the elusive tail is out of reach. After a while, the kitten gets tired and stops. Then the kitten decides to take a bath and the tail is right in her face. But, she doesn’t pay any attention to it. After her bath, she starts chasing her tail again. And, so goes a day in the life of a kitten.
The Hat
While walking down a road, two boys find a hat. When the first boy tries on the hat, he feels strange. So, he tries telling the second boy about the hat. But, his words are jumbled together. When he tries to shake the other boys hand, he is ten feet away shaking an imaginary person’s hand. When he gets home, the boy with the hat keeps falling up the stairs. The boys remove the hat and see the initials “BG” in the hat. They try to figure out the initials for hours. Then, the second boy says “Big Guy.”
Documents
A president and his wife decide to drive their beloved Corvette from the Washington D.C. to their beach home in Delaware. The man giggles as he loads the car with secure documents. He tells his wife to watch when he gets up to 80 miles per hour because the documents will fly out and land all over the place. After littering documents everywhere, his wife scolds him that it is against the law to spread confidential records all over the place. He grins and tells her the documents weren’t his. They were from the former president.
